This article really sums it up. One of the most frequent questions I get asked when on the topic of Joaquin is "Did you get prenatal testing?" I'm pretty passionate about this topic and I can feel my blood boiling a bit whenever I think about it. This article is so well written. It accurately describes my own feelings and thoughts...so much so I found myself in tears reading it. I just relate.
Check it out here.
There's no such thing as the perfect child.
Diego
Our First...smart, athletic, striking, driven, competitive, sensitive, energetic and loved.
Mateo
Our Second...smart, sweet, handsome, shy, stubborn, charming, focused and loved.
Joaquin
Our Third...smart, happy, feisty, adorable, charismatic, determined, busy and loved.
Sofia
Our Fourth...smart, healthy, social, silly, pretty, easygoing, focused and loved.
7 comments:
I can relate, too. My answer is usually, "No, because I wouldn't have changed anything." It usually is enough, but I hate the underlying question behind their question... and I get it more and more having a baby AFTER a child with Ds. Because, Heaven forbid, it should happen again, right? I love to use your family as an example of how Ds has opened our hearts and minds so much that friends of ours are adopting a beautiful girl WITH Ds from eastern Europe. Mindblowing to some...
I have no idea why people feel they have a right to ask such personal questions... While I don't have a child with Ds but I have worked with and fallen in love with many. Personally, I had prenatal testing done because I like to be prepared. While false positives may cause traumatic and unneeded worry for some, for others it may afford the time and ability to connect with others and gather information before the overwhelming emotions and exhaustion of becoming a new parent take the front seat. So for the same reasons I wanted to know in advance that I was having female twins, I would have prenatal testing again. Just my two cents for what it's worth. :o)
-Jenny T
I agree Jenny that many people get prenatal testing to be prepared (or at least that's how it starts out) but with the rate of termination in the high 90's for a diagnosis of DS there is something happening there...either the diagnosis is given without the proper support or encouragement or people are making decisions based on fear of the unknown. I find the most courageous and admirable families are those that do get prenatal testing and continue on with their pregnancy no matter what the news they receive. I wouldn't want that choice...I wouldn't want that power personally.
That was a great article!! Thanks for sharing!!! We have so much work to do for our little loves...
Sometimes it excites me and at times I wonder how we will be able to educate so many.
Prenatal testing is such a slippery slope...I totally agree with you, we were never supposed to have that much power or make such decisions. It hurts my heart that we live in a world where we put mothers in a position where they are asked to choose life or death for their children - disability or not. Life is not that simple - no life is.
This was a great article, thanks for sharing!
Wow, great essay. I really relate. I am going to have to pass this one on. Thanks Jen!
great article-thanks!
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